Have you ever been in a house that burned down? I’ve been in a couple. When things that normally shouldn’t burn do burn, there’s a certain acrid smell that, once in the nostrils, will be experienced again & again, and all it takes is a thought to recall. Accompanying that specific smell, in the wake of such a fire there’s a palpable feeling of despair. A weighty affliction that makes the heart skip and flutter, the stomach churn, and thoughts misfire as though the mind has become disconnected, disjointed.

We live close enough to such a scene, right now, that when the wind shifts, the scent can evoke all these thoughts and feelings in me.

Heaviness. Sadness. Hopes lost. Anger. Blaming. Grief. Just to name a few.

And these are all appropriate, even necessary emotions when loss is experienced. The idea of rebuilding can be overwhelming. Might even seem “just too much”. But there’s a way. A process. A grief that must take place. And then the rubble must be cleared – which comes at a cost. A physical, literal financial cost, and an emotional one too. All those same heavy emotions will resurface, and recirculate. But then, as progress is made, things will get easier. The foundation is poured. New pipes and plumbing. New electrical, new walls, etc. Maybe some new safety precautions considered and installed. Hope returns. A new start is possible!

I’ve experience a few “fires” in my life that were of an emotional source. They’ve ravaged my home, my health, my wellbeing – and not just mine, but affected my loved ones too. Even now, I’m doing the work of rebuilding. It’s hard, exhausting work. I get tired and want to just coast a while, let the work pause. But there’s no coasting in this sort of a rebuild. The only way to make it happen is to keep working. So, that is what I’m committed to doing. A new start is happening! A more secure future is being built!

“See, I am doing a new thing!
    Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
I am making a way in the wilderness
    and streams in the wasteland.”
Isaiah 43:19